Forgive us, this post is not strictly limited to the Backstreet Boys, but trust us, most of you will relate. Remember
a few years ago when you were young and convinced that you would go to a concert, a Backstreet Boy would spot you in the 12th row (you know because you counted 100 times because a number sounds closer than a letter) and immediately fall in love with you. Cue the fireworks!
As we all know NOW, that’s not how it happens – despite what our moms tried to tell us. In light of the crushing blow that Joe Jonas has delivered to fangirls around the world today by becoming engaged and the 2nd Jonas Brother off the market (remember when our numbers kept dwindling?!), we decided that a post walking us back through the painful experience was necessary to let all fans know that we are all in this together / have been there before. It gets better eventually.
1. First, your world will spin in a weird way.
“[Insert coveted boyband member’s name here] has announced that he is engaged to longtime girlfriend, [insert name of girl you say you care nothing about but know everything about and follow on every social platform here].”
Woah. Even if you knew it was coming, the words are still a shock. Are you numb? Are you happy? Are you suddenly feeling drunk without drinking? Are you palms sweating? WHY DID HE NOT WARN YOU?
2. You’ll act like you’re fine because you’re a functioning adult.
It’s fiiiiiiiiiiiinnee. I’m fiinnneeee. So happy for them! (You say as you dig your nails into your steering wheel on the way to the liquor store)
If honestly does not even matter if you’re married or single, you’ll have the same knee jerk reaction. It’s fine for you to be off the market, but aren’t you supposed to be able to vote in a TRL sort of way whether or not your favorite member can get married or not? Weren’t you supposed to help pick out the ring? WASN’T IT SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR RING?
3. Go online. You need a support group.
Everyone knows that if you’re feeling a sort of way, your fan friends are too. Don’t have fan friends? This is the perfect time to make them! There’s some great bonding to be done in the emotional wrecks that losing our faves to another woman make us become. Take it to the DMs though – you may regret what your feelings of loss make you say in the heat of the moment.
4. Feelings will be hard. So hard.
The fiance is usually a really great woman and you’re all for girl power. Up until engagement day, you probably genuinely liked every one of her posts on social media, thought she was a great catch, and ‘awww’-ed over pics of the happy couple.
But engagement – woah – whole new level outside of the controlled environment that you’re used to. I mean, this is a big life change – for you AND for him AND for her. Up until now, there might still be hypothetical room for you to move in for a second or two, but NOW….nowwwww….this is hard.
While you want to be happy for them (and you WILL wish them ‘all the best’ yada yada), you’re going to be petty for a day …or week…or month…or year or two.
5. You’ll get over it and the sun will rise again!
Once you get over the fact that she isn’t you and realize that most of the boyband fiances and wives are actually cooler than the boyband member at times, you’ll forget the feelings you once harbored.
Ok, you won’t FORGET…but you’ll find it in your heart to forgive. You’ll live with the fact that if it wasn’t going to be you, she was the 2nd best choice. And when you realize he’s happy, —LONG SIGH— you’ll be happy too.
You will also most likely spend the wedding day drunk, offline, and in bed. That’s cool too. It happens to the best of us. 😉
Things are going to be okay. Tours will continue. Albums (and really cute babies) will be made and we’ll ALL be one big happy family. Actually, their happiness has made things better all around. At least that’s how it’s gone of the Backstreet side of things.
Best wishes, fellow fangirls. We’re with you. We’ve been there and we’ve made it through (most of us without restraining orders).
DISCLAIMER: This is all in good humor. We are adults. We know not EVERYONE feels / felt this way. We are obviously very happy for all of the Backstreet Boys and all married boyband members. No need to tweet, comment, etc. about how you were always happy for the couples — we get it. 🙂