If you’ve been a fan for any length of time, you know what we mean when we talk about the very particular process that happens when befriending other fans that happens very naturally (unless you’re one of those people who is cool hanging out with anyone, even though they may be psycho serial killers).
Times have changed since the 90s. We’re not going with our moms to concerts (ok, some of us are, but that’s beside the point) and we’re making fan friends across the world thanks to the gift of social media. Sometimes, we’ve been friends with people for years before we even meet them. It’s interesting – the way things work.
A lot of it starts the same way though…
1. Seeing multiple posts, tweets, comments from the same person that seems to see things the way you do.
If you’re friends with other fans on social media, follow BSB sites, etc. and it just so happens that all the tweets, comments, photos you like most are coming from the same person, ideas of potential friendship start to cloud your brain. Is it weird to friend them? Should you simply like something or comment on it? Hmm, what move to make?
Similarly, if you keep seeing someone at the same concerts and events that you are, do you go up to them and sound creepy? Do you hang back and stalk them online then “discover” that you guys were at the same event together (“Haha, isn’t that so weird?!”)?
Do you even need more friends?
2. Tweet, tweet. Hint, hint.
Ok, that’s enough. This person is posting fire photos and every tweet they send makes you say “YES, EXACTLY!” so of course, now is the time to strike. Is this person social? Are you going to vibe? Does he / she even want friends? Only one way to find out.
Stroke an ego. “I’m obsessed with your pics!” or “You take the words RIGHT out of my mouth everytime.” We’ve all done it. These phrases are only gateway drugs to potential friendships or unity over loving and hating the same things together. These words are the equivalent of a dog sniffing a stranger.
3. Let’s take this somewhere a little more private.
Okkaayyy – perspective friend is saying all the right things and this is as nerve wracking as a new relationship. How is it going to work out? IS IT going to work out? What if she thinks differently than you do about your favorite? The fact that she has the same favorite Backstreet Boy could bode well for conversation, but not so well when it comes to sharing a cruise pic (should it get that far).
Eventually though, your convos will need more than 140 characters. Both of you will stop ending every message with “lol” and there is great satisfaction in the novel-sized messages going back and forth through direct messages…
…THEN PHONE CALLS… (But that’s only if it’s really serious – don’t panic.)
4. Sniff, sniff.
Much like #3, this is going down in the DMs and the texts. This is the finest filter and the last step to becoming fan friends. Are you really getting along or is this just an “in the moment” thing? Are you dying to talk or are you tolerating? Are they feeling your vibe and picking up what you’re putting down? Would they move out of the way if your favorite Backstreet Boy was coming close? Would they yell his name so you could get a selfie? Most importantly, do they hate the same people / things that you do?
Don’t lie. That’s totally a factor.
5. Which piece of the puzzle does this friend go into?
So you’ve friend zoned someone and in this case, that’s a good thing.
First, you have to figure out if they’re on the same level. There’s nothing worse [in life] than thinking someone is something but it’s not mutual. That’s for a Taylor Swift song, honestly.
If you’ve BOTH made it to the friend zone, here comes the tricky part – figuring out the level of friendom…er, friendship. Will they get along with your existing fan friends? Could room with them on a cruise? Do you put them in your wedding? WHERE DOES THIS NEW
PIECE FRIEND FIT?
If you are actually friends, it’ll be gravy, baby! Just watch.
6. All the memories!
Congratulations on your new friendship! You now have someone committed to listening and complaining or screaming in excitement with you. You have someone to go to concerts with, share photos, and share ALL the memories with – whether in person or online.
Most importantly, you have someone that has your back. You have someone that will give you an opinion on what to wear to VIP and someone that will take up for you in any situation. If you’re lucky enough, your fan friend turns into one of your best friends.
[We would know. :)]